The mid-career crisis is real, and most professionals experience it at some stage of their working life. It leaves people less effective than they once were — stressed, directionless, and, in some cases, out of a job. In this blog, I want to share my own experience of dealing with it, along with what I’ve seen working with clients going through the same thing.
What triggers a mid-career crisis?
A mid-career crisis can be set off by both internal and external factors.
Internal factors are the ones that come from within — a deep desire for freedom of choice in how and when you work, or the pull of other dreams like travelling, spending time with family, or contributing to society. It can also be triggered by high expectations and big ambitions, fed by global exposure or the start-up culture, where people seem to move on to big things much earlier in life.
External factors are the triggers outside your control — a shift in the business environment that reduces the importance of certain roles, or skills turning obsolete and leaving you redundant.
When someone hits this state, they go through a transition. Transitions are never comfortable, so this is not an easy place to be. But managed well, this same transition can lead to beautiful results.
First, recognize the signs
Before we can even think about managing a mid-career crisis, we have to identify and acknowledge that we’re in one. Watch for these signs — in yourself, or in a family member, friend, or colleague.
1. The passion has gone. A role that once thrilled and energized you has, after years of repetition, taken its toll. You drag yourself to work each day, and only because you need a stable job.
2. It’s become boring and predictable. You know exactly what to expect each day. You can already predict the feedback your boss will give at year-end, guess your rating, guess your bonus. There’s no excitement left.
3. You get that sinking feeling. You sleepwalk through the job, and your performance starts to slip. You’re passed over for promotions, you feel your boss no longer values you, and you sense there’s no room left to grow or make an impact. You may even feel your peers and juniors are getting smarter and savvier than you — that they have all the solutions, and you’re increasingly dependent on them. Disillusioned, you start contemplating a change of job or even career, held back only by the perceived risks of the switch. You feel stuck.
4. There’s nothing new to learn. Your learning has stalled. You’re just reapplying what you already know, and wondering about your future.
5. You’re drawn into negativity. The common thread in your conversations becomes complaint. You whine about the job, the organization, and slip into needless gossip about bosses and co-workers. Sinking into that quicksand of negativity is catastrophic. As Rick Hanson puts it, “the brain is like Velcro for negative experiences but Teflon for positive ones.”
6. You start neglecting your wellbeing. Constant irritation and frustration build into stress and anxiety, and to cope, people often turn to unhealthy habits. Ignoring physical activity, nutrition, and wellbeing under the weight of constant worry is itself a sign — and it erodes the very capacity you need to handle the situation.
From my experience, a mid-career crisis is not unusual at all. It can happen to almost anyone, at any stage. The reasons differ from person to person, so the solution is specific to each individual too. The good news: it can be managed — provided you acknowledge it and genuinely want to deal with it.
How to navigate your way out of a mid-career crisis
Here are some strategies I’d invite you to experiment with, to see what works in your situation.
1. Reboot your mind. Every change begins with the self, and changing your state of mind starts with accepting the situation. Consider taking some time away from the chaos to clear your head — do things with no connection to your day-to-day work, things that bring you joy and a healthier state of being. The mind is at its most creative when it’s free from fear, failure, and uncertainty. Once rebooted, you can immerse yourself in the real question: what caused this crisis? Is it situational, or is there a deeper reason underneath? Identifying the factors behind the slump is a prerequisite to solving it.
2. Evaluate, re-evaluate, and reset. Think about the constraints standing between you and what you want. Here’s an activity that has helped me and my clients many times:
- Draw a big cube in the centre of a page, and leave it empty for now.
- Around it, draw small cubes — write one reason for your mid-career crisis in each.
- Look hard at each reason and ask: is it really true, or an assumption? Strike off the assumptions. What’s left are your actual problem statements. Often, once the cloud lifts, you realize things aren’t as bad as they first seemed.
- The small cubes are your problems; the big centre box is your solution box. For each solution, identify a specific behaviour you’ll display.
Writing is a powerful way to solve problems — it gives structure, and lets you look at your problems from a distance.
3. The science of small wins. Now it’s time to bring your mojo back. Set goals based on the activity above, and strive to meet them. They can be specific to that exercise, or drawn from your daily job — finishing an analysis, closing tasks well before they’re due. Small wins have enormous power; they’re the fuel for transformative change. When we manage to change small things, we feel a growing sense of satisfaction and control. If you can, keep a log of them — completed the task on time, got an appreciation note from my boss. Picture each small win as a brick building your own wall of fame. Small wins have the power to create a new self-image.
4. Plan for social inhibitions. In a low career phase, we’re caught between being ashamed of ourselves and worrying about what others think of us. As shame researcher Brené Brown says, “vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy and creativity.” Identify one person who can be your cheerleader while you find your way out. Being open about your challenges and seeking help will rebuild your confidence and push you toward bigger goals.
5. Create white space in your routine. The monotony of doing the same things over and over can drive you to boredom or despair. Find your own way to break it — a hobby class, an outdoor activity, time with your children, some volunteering, anything. That room to recharge is what readies you for the next day, the next week, the next big goal.
6. Start a side hustle. If your answer is a new job, career, or business, begin it as a side hustle. It’s like planting a seed and letting it grow strong enough to eventually sustain your dream.
7. Find a professional coach. It always helps to work with a neutral person. A coach is trained to facilitate your thinking and makes an excellent sounding board — which is where career transition coaching can make the real difference between staying stuck and moving forward.
So go ahead: accept and acknowledge that you’re in a mid-career crisis, choose the right strategies, and resolve to work through the grid. All the very best. Leave a comment below and let me know what you think.
